How can I communicate better with my co-parent?

Unless abuse was present in your family home, it is likely that you are managing a joint custody situation with your ex-spouse-turned-co-parent after your divorce. For a number of reasons, managing the relationship with your co-parent may prove challenging.

One of the most difficult aspects of rebuilding your co-parenting situation with your ex-spouse after divorce is managing communication. According to Divorce Mag, keeping your communications with your co-parent professional, concise and completely about the children will lead to success.

Professional and concise

Particularly if you have a personally fraught relationship with your co-parent due to issues related to the divorce or prior relationship, professionalism is the way to go. In fact, one of the best things to do is transfer all of your Communications with your co-parent to email. Treat your co-parent the same way you might a co-worker. This will help you keep the focus where it needs to be: on the kids.

It is also beneficial to be brief. Sending your co-parent a five-page long email is likely not going to end very well. Try to commit to communicating often with your co-parent, but be concise and to the point when you do so.

Remember the focus

Keeping the focus on the kids can also help prevent arguments. There is absolutely no reason for you and your co-parent to be talking about anything personal when discussing the children. Communication should always be about the kids, and nothing more.

Keep your communications with your co-parent polite and civil. Do not swear, do not write in all capitals and prepare to say “please” and “thank you” frequently. Again, the purpose of co-parenting is to act in a manner that best benefits the children.